Reclaim Your Journey
by Jennifer Rose & Better Existence | January 28, 2015
We are born into a cluster of identities that may or may not suit us.
We are born into a family, a nation, a culture, a religion. We are immediately the son or daughter of this one and that one, and possibly also the brother or sister of these and those ones. In this tiny societal microcosm called the family people may tell us we are smart or stupid, attractive or not, interesting or not, relevant or not. And we believe them.
As time goes by we identify with the local school, a group of friends, and maybe the popular culture. We learn the dos and don'ts of our city, state, and country.
Who Is an Expert on What Is Right for Us?
Then it gets messy. My country tells me I can marry my same sex partner. My church tells me I will go to hell if I do. My state tells me I can smoke weed; my country tells me I had better not. My Muslim grandmother wears a burka. My Balinese grandmother does not wear a shirt. My television tells me I had better save for retirement. Then it tells me to spend my money on a car. Or should I give it to charity? My doctor tells me coffee is good for my sluggish metabolism. I read an article by an expert that says that is wrong.
There is no possibility of finding agreement among the diverse judgments that come with human identifications, affiliations, and the endless game of who is "in" and who is "out."
Now what?
Follow My Bliss?
"Do what you love and the money will follow." --Marsha Sinetar
No wait. Here is an article in Forbes that tells you not to do what you love! Five Reasons to Ignore the Advice to Do What You Love.
“If you do follow your bliss you put yourself on a kind of track that has been there all the while, waiting for you, and the life that you ought to be living is the one you are living. Follow your bliss and don't be afraid, and doors will open where you didn't know they were going to be.” --Joseph Campbell
"I feel like being into the beat of your own drum has become too prominent in the culture." Mos Def
It would be funny if it were not so painful.
Get Ready for the Nay-Saying Choir. They Are Definitely Going to Sing to You.
When you do what you love, you will be surrounded by people who will tell you you are wrong.
Forbes and Mos Def will most definitely be in line to tell you you are wrong.
The happiest, the most transcendent people I know are constantly being criticized. They are called idiots. They are called narrow-minded. They are called snooty know-it-alls. They are called misguided, ignorant, and even heartless. They do not care much about that. They are people who have come to a certain point in their lives, and they have risen above the cacophony and the confusion.
When you cannot take another minute of failing to measure up to conflicting, external expectations of how to be good enough, call me. That is when you will be ready to stand up to the nay sayers.
You Can Trust Yourself
There is a path back to self-reliance that will foil even the earliest suggestions from others of who you are. There is a You in you that is untouched by judgments and labels waiting to live a life enriched by Your values and meanings. You may have a goal and purpose for your life that has been derailed by the judgmental noise all around you. Honestly, I have no idea what it is. But You know. And that is what strength-focused coaching is about. It is about handing you back your power, and being an ally in reaching Your goals.
There is a Yoga story about an orphan lion who is adopted by a flock of sheep. Thank goodness the orphan baby was adopted! That is a good thing! The baby lion drank sheep's milk, then learned to eat grass, and learned to run away from danger. The orphan lion got along well in his sheep society. One day, danger came as a pride of hungry lions. "Baaaa. Noooo." The lion, who had grown quite large, said as he ran away with the other frightened sheep. One of the lions stopped to speak with the orphan lion. "Why are you afraid?" the lion asked, and he walked the orphan lion to the edge of a pool and showed him his reflection. "That is who you are," the lion said.
You Are a Lion
Reclaim your journey. Reclaim your life, not by sifting through the conflicting chatter of the experts, but by testing, and then trusting your own experience. Learn to pay attention to how you feel. Set aside the conflicting thoughts that have promised and failed to deliver insight into what makes Your life worth living.
Center yourself in the feelings You want to feel, and the experiences that make You proud. Notice what you are contributing when you are experiencing those feelings. Those are Your strengths. Those are Your best attributes. They will always be there for you. You can trust yourself.
Okay. Go!
Jennifer Rose is a Meditation and Stress-Reduction Skills Instructor as well as a Strengths-focused Coach. She is available to teach classes and workshops to groups and individuals both in person and online. 646-831-2675
We are born into a family, a nation, a culture, a religion. We are immediately the son or daughter of this one and that one, and possibly also the brother or sister of these and those ones. In this tiny societal microcosm called the family people may tell us we are smart or stupid, attractive or not, interesting or not, relevant or not. And we believe them.
As time goes by we identify with the local school, a group of friends, and maybe the popular culture. We learn the dos and don'ts of our city, state, and country.
Who Is an Expert on What Is Right for Us?
Then it gets messy. My country tells me I can marry my same sex partner. My church tells me I will go to hell if I do. My state tells me I can smoke weed; my country tells me I had better not. My Muslim grandmother wears a burka. My Balinese grandmother does not wear a shirt. My television tells me I had better save for retirement. Then it tells me to spend my money on a car. Or should I give it to charity? My doctor tells me coffee is good for my sluggish metabolism. I read an article by an expert that says that is wrong.
There is no possibility of finding agreement among the diverse judgments that come with human identifications, affiliations, and the endless game of who is "in" and who is "out."
Now what?
Follow My Bliss?
"Do what you love and the money will follow." --Marsha Sinetar
No wait. Here is an article in Forbes that tells you not to do what you love! Five Reasons to Ignore the Advice to Do What You Love.
“If you do follow your bliss you put yourself on a kind of track that has been there all the while, waiting for you, and the life that you ought to be living is the one you are living. Follow your bliss and don't be afraid, and doors will open where you didn't know they were going to be.” --Joseph Campbell
"I feel like being into the beat of your own drum has become too prominent in the culture." Mos Def
It would be funny if it were not so painful.
Get Ready for the Nay-Saying Choir. They Are Definitely Going to Sing to You.
When you do what you love, you will be surrounded by people who will tell you you are wrong.
Forbes and Mos Def will most definitely be in line to tell you you are wrong.
The happiest, the most transcendent people I know are constantly being criticized. They are called idiots. They are called narrow-minded. They are called snooty know-it-alls. They are called misguided, ignorant, and even heartless. They do not care much about that. They are people who have come to a certain point in their lives, and they have risen above the cacophony and the confusion.
When you cannot take another minute of failing to measure up to conflicting, external expectations of how to be good enough, call me. That is when you will be ready to stand up to the nay sayers.
You Can Trust Yourself
There is a path back to self-reliance that will foil even the earliest suggestions from others of who you are. There is a You in you that is untouched by judgments and labels waiting to live a life enriched by Your values and meanings. You may have a goal and purpose for your life that has been derailed by the judgmental noise all around you. Honestly, I have no idea what it is. But You know. And that is what strength-focused coaching is about. It is about handing you back your power, and being an ally in reaching Your goals.
There is a Yoga story about an orphan lion who is adopted by a flock of sheep. Thank goodness the orphan baby was adopted! That is a good thing! The baby lion drank sheep's milk, then learned to eat grass, and learned to run away from danger. The orphan lion got along well in his sheep society. One day, danger came as a pride of hungry lions. "Baaaa. Noooo." The lion, who had grown quite large, said as he ran away with the other frightened sheep. One of the lions stopped to speak with the orphan lion. "Why are you afraid?" the lion asked, and he walked the orphan lion to the edge of a pool and showed him his reflection. "That is who you are," the lion said.
You Are a Lion
Reclaim your journey. Reclaim your life, not by sifting through the conflicting chatter of the experts, but by testing, and then trusting your own experience. Learn to pay attention to how you feel. Set aside the conflicting thoughts that have promised and failed to deliver insight into what makes Your life worth living.
Center yourself in the feelings You want to feel, and the experiences that make You proud. Notice what you are contributing when you are experiencing those feelings. Those are Your strengths. Those are Your best attributes. They will always be there for you. You can trust yourself.
Okay. Go!
Jennifer Rose is a Meditation and Stress-Reduction Skills Instructor as well as a Strengths-focused Coach. She is available to teach classes and workshops to groups and individuals both in person and online. 646-831-2675
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| "Valor" by Jennifer Rose |
1 comment:
Yep. You got it, Babe.
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